Our last two devotional posts (Why Doesn’t God Heal My Chronic Illness? and God’s Providence in Chronic Illness) have been about embracing chronic illness, accepting what God gives us, and thanking God for the ways He uses our suffering for His glory.
Does this mean we don’t ask God for change, that we throw up our hands and resign ourselves hopelessly to chronic illness the rest of our lives?
Not in the least. God wants us to pour out our heart before Him (Ps 62:8) and bring our requests to Him (Phil 4:6-7). He delights in receiving our petitions. There are, however, plenty of Bible verses about the heart behind what we ask God.
The best example of this kind of heart comes from the story of Hannah in 1 Samuel 1.
The Woman Who Asked
Hannah’s story includes some echoes of the story of Sarah, the woman who laughed at God because she was barren and past the age of childbearing when God promised she would have a baby.
Those of us with chronic illness may not face the same challenge of infertility, but we can relate to Sarah when our physical capacity is at zero–when we feel barren in the limitations of chronic illness–and God calls us to do something beyond what we consider our natural ability.
I’d like to bring this same comparison to the life of Hannah. Think about these descriptions and compare them to chronic illness:
1. Hannah suffered physically. The Bible isn’t clear whether she had a condition or disease or whether her infertility was divinely allowed despite a healthy body. Either way, she was physically limited from getting pregnant.
2. Hannah suffered emotionally. She wanted to be a mother. She wanted children. She wanted to hear the patter of little feet around her home and feel the press of little arms around her neck. She lived in a culture that treasured children and saw them as gifts from God. As Elisabeth Elliot has said, “Suffering is wanting what you don’t have or not wanting what you do have.” Hannah suffered with the unfulfilled desires to have children (Prov 13:12) and must have wondered if God was punishing her.
3. Hannah suffered socially. She had one rival in particular, Peninah, her husband’s other wife. This woman believed that Hannah was suffering because of sin, lorded it over Hannah because she had children and Hannah did not (from the same man, no less), and wasted no opportunity to belittle Hannah for her pitiable situation. No doubt other women similarly looked down on, judged, or misunderstood Hannah.
Can you relate to Hannah’s suffering? I know my physical situation is different, but I relate to Hannah’s frustration with a fallen human body, to her deep longing for what she didn’t have, and to her conflicts with people who didn’t understand her reality.
We’re not told why Hannah couldn’t have children, only that God specifically prevented her from having children; the text states this twice in two verses. Perhaps she did have some heart issues that she had to work through, or perhaps she was innocent of the culture’s assumption of sin and God intentionally prevented her childbearing to prepare for a great work.
Whatever the case, it boils down to this: while God had promised a son to Abraham and Sarah despite their age and Sarah’s infertility, Hannah had no such promise to cling to. She had no expectations that she would have a child, only her natural desires and dreams to have a child.
So she asked.
She didn’t resign herself to her situation. She didn’t give up hope of any change ever. She didn’t wallow or mope or throw pity parties in her suffering.
She brought her heart to God and asked Him for a son.
She finally threw herself wholeheartedly on God and His will.
Along with what she asked, let’s look more closely at how she asked.
1. Hannah asked from a place of surrender
Who knows how long it took for Hannah to reach this point of utter brokenness, the brokenness not just of pain but also of humility–this rock-bottom place of self-emptiness and God-dependence.
Chuck Smith preached,
Now with Hannah there was a reason why God delayed the answer, and with us. If God delays the answer of our prayers there’s a reason for His delay. Often times, with Hannah, the reason being that God is seeking to bring us around to His purposes. The Bible says, “The eyes of the LORD go to and fro throughout the entire earth to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose hearts are completely towards Him” (2 Chronicles 16:9). So God was waiting, bringing Hannah around to where her heart was completely towards God, and the things of God, and that which God wanted.
(See Isaiah 30:18.) Smith went on to discuss verses such as Romans 8:26, James 4:3, and 1 John 5:14-15 that point out why God may not answer our prayers: because we’re asking for the wrong reason. When our hearts are not aligned with God’s will, God will not give us our requests.
Smith then concluded,
Hannah no doubt was for a long time just thinking, “Lord, I want a son so that other wife will shut her mouth”, tired of this business of being chided all the time. “Lord, I want a son that I can nurse. I want a son that I can take care of.” She was thinking of herself. Now through the processes of God’s working in her life, she was a godly woman, it is expressed as we get into the next chapter and we read of her rejoicing when God answered her prayer. We see that in the praise of Hannah, there are earmarks of a depth of spirituality. Now she’s brought into harmony with the purposes of God.
Let that ending sentence sink in: “Now she’s brought into harmony with the purposes of God.”
No matter how badly Hannah wanted a son, no matter how desperately she begged God for a child, God waited to answer her prayer until she could pray from a place of humility and surrender–from a heart fully “brought into harmony” with God’s will.
2. Hannah asked for the purpose of God’s glory
Hannah asked in order to give back to God–to give not just a one-time sacrifice of worship or praise, but the very son she wanted. She promised to give this boy back to God in lifelong dedication to God’s service. You could think of it as the equivalent of praying for a child to send into church ministry or even foreign missions.
Hannah saw the spiritual dearth in her society, in her generation, and wanted her son to be used by God to serve in His worship and minister to His people.
She didn’t ask for herself but for the glory of God and the good of her community.
Let’s bring the conversation back to chronic illness. It’s natural to want to be well, have strength, and regain the capacity we’ve lost–or gain the capacity we’ve never had. And it’s not wrong to ask for these things.
We are always welcome to ask. It’s up to God and His wisdom how to answer.
If you’re asking God for a miracle of healing or recovery or change, though, ask yourself why.
Psalm 37:4 says,
Delight yourself also in the LORD,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
As I learned from a sermon by Pastor Louie Giglio (and further studied on my own), the word “delight” here comes from the Hebrew word that means malleable–flexible, bendable, shapeable. Pastor Giglio’s point was, let God shape your desires, and then He’ll grant them.
Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
Proverbs 3:6
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.
The Woman Who Received
Here’s the end of the story: Hannah had a boy and named him Samuel (meaning “heard of God,” “asked of God,” “name of God,” or “son of God”). When he was weaned (Jewish mothers often nursed until age three or so), she brought him to the tabernacle, to the very place where she had asked for him, and gave him back to God.
Even at an early age, God used Samuel to share His Word with Israel and to give His wisdom to His people. Samuel found favor with God and man, and God never let a single one of his words fall to the ground (go unfulfilled). Samuel grew up to judge Israel and anoint not the first one but the first two kings of God’s people. He mentored King David and served as an example and leader until his death. He left behind a legacy as one of the greatest prophets of Israel who not only saw but helped bring about some of the biggest changes in the nation’s history.
All because a barren, anguished, humbled mother reached the point of praying for a gift not for herself but for God’s purposes in His plan for His people.
When we reach the end of ourselves and completely, fully humble ourselves to God’s will, that’s when He can use us the most–not for our own purposes but for His plan.
I love what Mary Elizabeth Baxter wrote on this passage:
A straw will show which way the wind blows, and the tone of Hannah’s prayers throws light upon the burden of her soul. She asked of God no son who should shine in the world, who should make a fortune, and become a great man, as regarded possessions, honour, or political power. She wanted a Nazarite, a consecrated and dedicated man, one who should be the Lord’s special witness, to shine in the midst of darkness, to be a blessing where the priesthood failed to be so. Hannah wanted a prophet son, an interpreter of God; and by this we see how powerless her husband’s comfort was to her. . . .
There was a strong contrast between Eve and Hannah. Eve sought a son for herself; Hannah prayed for a son for God. In Eve’s heart “I have gotten” was the expression with which she greeted the gift of God; but
“I HAVE GIVEN”
was the thought in Hannah’s heart.
Does this challenge you the way it challenged me about praying for healing?
Do we ask for healing for ourselves or for God? Because we want out of the trial or because we want to see God work in other ways? With self-centered motives or with God-centered desires?
Gordon MacDonald writes in Ordering Your Private World that “worship and intercession are far more the business of aligning myself with God’s purposes than asking Him to align with mine” (p. 227). In Habits of Grace, David Mathis adds that “prayer is not finally about getting things from God, but getting God” (95).
Our prayer should not be “God, give me better health so I can keep up with all my friends” or “so I can earn more money” or “so I can check these things off my bucket list.”
Instead, may our prayer be, “God, if You will give me strength, more capacity, better stamina, increased energy, I will use it for your glory” and “so You can use me in Your Kingdom” and “so I can know more of You.”
Ultimately, we would pray, “God, be glorified in my strength the same way that You’re glorified in my weakness.”
I’d like to leave you with one final commentary on Hannah’s story:
Here the Lord gives barren and humiliated Hannah a son in answer to her prayer. The story of Hannah presents a sharp contrast with that of Deborah, another significant woman of Ephraim from the period of the Judges. Deborah’s career impacted Israelite society through political clout, judicial leadership, and prophetic activity; Hannah’s effect on Israelite society came through the gentle forces of faith and motherhood. Through Hannah the point is made that women of faith played a legitimate and even formative role in shaping Israel’s history. Hannah’s faith turned the tide of the period of the Judges by producing the transitional figure Samuel. In this passage Israelite faith expresses its supreme paradox and boldest affirmation—the Lord may create social and natural tragedies in order to accomplish his purposes that far outweigh the calamity. The Lord sometimes engineers social tragedies, yet he carries them out “that the work of God might be displayed” (John 9:3). Accordingly, human tragedy can be properly evaluated and appreciated only when viewed with a consideration of the end results and ultimate purposes brought about by God.
Robert D. Bergen, 1 & 2 Samuel – New American Commentary, emphasis added
Do you ask God for healing? If so, when was the last time you examined your heart behind your request? How can you imitate Hannah’s posture of humility and surrender in prayer?
The Valley 